COUNSELOR’S CORNER
News From Your School Counselor
"Good Ways to Deal with Report Cards"
Many parents approach report card time with apprehension. Parents want to do something about their children's grades, but often are not sure of the best approach. Putting report cards in adult perspective sometimes helps. Consider the following hypothetical situation. Your performance review at work was not spectacular. The boss criticized you for being late several times and for sub par work on a recent project. When you get home, you are upset. You show the review to your spouse. Which of the following responses would you find most helpful?
1) Your spouse berates you for your performance, pointing out how he or she had warned you this would happen if you did not get up earlier and put in some extra time at the office.
2) Your spouse becomes furious at your company in general and your boss in particular. Your spouse resolves to go to the office the next morning and tell off your boss.
3) Your spouse understands your disappointment and reassures you of your family's support. Later, after you have calmed down, he or she helps you plan a new morning routine that will get you out of the house half an hour earlier.
Certainly, the third response is the most likely to make lemonade out of that lemon of a performance review. In response three, the spouse did two things right: reacted first to your feelings, and when the emotion was defused, helped plan a practical approach to the problem.
THESE PRINCIPLES CAN HELP YOU TO HELP YOUR CHILD AT REPORT CARD TIME!
DEAL WITH THE EMOTION: Although your child might not show it, he/she will be elated with a good report card and feel hurt and inadequate with a poor one. Ask first, "How do you feel about this?" Then, listen and watch carefully. Body language can often tell more than words.
DEVELOP A PLAN OF ACTION: As you and your child develop a plan of action, keep in mind that your child deserves a rational approach to his/her academic difficulties and successes, rather than an emotional one. Your child will appreciate your objectivity and needs to know that at the same time you remain a loyal partner who will be there to support and understand him/her.
An Adaptation from George Corney
WTE – Be The Change
News From Your School Counselor
"Good Ways to Deal with Report Cards"
Many parents approach report card time with apprehension. Parents want to do something about their children's grades, but often are not sure of the best approach. Putting report cards in adult perspective sometimes helps. Consider the following hypothetical situation. Your performance review at work was not spectacular. The boss criticized you for being late several times and for sub par work on a recent project. When you get home, you are upset. You show the review to your spouse. Which of the following responses would you find most helpful?
1) Your spouse berates you for your performance, pointing out how he or she had warned you this would happen if you did not get up earlier and put in some extra time at the office.
2) Your spouse becomes furious at your company in general and your boss in particular. Your spouse resolves to go to the office the next morning and tell off your boss.
3) Your spouse understands your disappointment and reassures you of your family's support. Later, after you have calmed down, he or she helps you plan a new morning routine that will get you out of the house half an hour earlier.
Certainly, the third response is the most likely to make lemonade out of that lemon of a performance review. In response three, the spouse did two things right: reacted first to your feelings, and when the emotion was defused, helped plan a practical approach to the problem.
THESE PRINCIPLES CAN HELP YOU TO HELP YOUR CHILD AT REPORT CARD TIME!
DEAL WITH THE EMOTION: Although your child might not show it, he/she will be elated with a good report card and feel hurt and inadequate with a poor one. Ask first, "How do you feel about this?" Then, listen and watch carefully. Body language can often tell more than words.
DEVELOP A PLAN OF ACTION: As you and your child develop a plan of action, keep in mind that your child deserves a rational approach to his/her academic difficulties and successes, rather than an emotional one. Your child will appreciate your objectivity and needs to know that at the same time you remain a loyal partner who will be there to support and understand him/her.
An Adaptation from George Corney
WTE – Be The Change